Yep. You heard me. HOT NAKED MEN. My how I love them so...
For an early birthday treat, my SILs, my cousin and I all headed out to the local casino to see some hot man action. They were called American Storm, and claimed to be the top "man show" act in Vegas. Honestly, I find that hard to believe, but maybe...
It was a lot of fun. My two SILs were a little worried before the show started, but once they got past the first guys act, they loosened up and felt some relief. Even though, they did tense up whenever the guy would jump off stage and go looking for a girl to molest in the audience. They brought several girls up on stage and we were all worried that one of us would get picked. I didn't care too much, because obviously, any reason I get to put my hands all over some hot-rock-hard-ab man, I'm totally going to take it, but I guess some girls are a little more modest than I am. (Imagine that.)
DJ's sister got a lap dance from one of them. He ran her hands down his chest. She didn't really know what to do. Then she said she didn't know what to do with all the oil on her hands, so she just rubbed it in... ha!
I couldn't really get into that guy though because he had a strong resemblance to my friend Kai. No offense to Kai, but he's beaten into my head how nasty he thinks girls are a little too much. (ummm.. did I mention his gayness?) So seeing a guy that looked like my gay friend, taking his cloths off, sort of worried me. All that being said, I sure hope my friend Kai looks like this guy did with no clothes on!
The announcer/stripper came up to me because it was my birthday and talked to me for a while. (OK. I was a little relieved that I didn't get pulled up on stage.) Then, one of the other guys came over later and slimmed me up with all his body oil and gave me a kiss. (On the cheek. Don't freak out.)
Afterwards we headed to the lounge for a free drink. Some of the strippers showed up there afterwards, so that was fun to watch all the drunken girls fall all over them. As if these strippers are really going to have a relationship with any fat girl from Fargo. Seriously.
The announcer/stripper guy gave me his business card. He works at Tao as one of their VIP Marketers. So if anyone wants free tickets to a "Man Show" let me know and I'll give the dude a call! I was a little sad that the guy had a real job on top of stripping. I would have much rather have enjoyed thinking of him as just a piece of meat. But oh well, now I have free show tickets next time I'm in Vegas! Who's gonna meet me there next time?
Showing posts with label Birthdays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Birthdays. Show all posts
Monday, November 03, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
Shittiest Day Ever?
I think so! This could have been one of the shittiest work days I've ever had at my office. It's been hella busy at my office. It's gotten to the point that I have 400 emails in my inbox to do something with, but I don't have time to do anything with them. So there they sit. (
which reminds me. Please don't email me at my office for a while. If you do, you're just going into a filtered folder for me to find some day when I get some of this shit off my plate.)
This week, I get to deal with this lady from Germany who is our CEO's current favorite pet. Nothing is organized, nothing is scheduled, and even though she says she's going to meet with you, she almost always, tries to back out. Unless you are someone she get sucker into buying into whatever new product she's developed, she doesn't want to meet with you. (Even though, it's my team that is driving sales on those products. So you'd think she'd be kicking my ass.... ) Today I got to interrupt a meeting because I was told that there was no other business to be had other than for my team to film the 16 videos we have planned.
You can probably imagine my infuriation when I walk to the boardroom to find her having a meeting. (One that I can only assume is her pushing some new product that she wants us to sell for her) After an hour passing, I complained to my boss who advised me that I interrupt and tell her we will be filming in 10 minutes. I thought that was a little harsh, so I instead interrupted and told the room full of executives that we needed to film today. To which, German lady tried to push me off until tomorrow. Which, in turn, I got to (politely as I could be) say, "I'm sorry, no. (Big fat flipping NO!) We have no time to wait until tomorrow if "you/she" wants time to know what's going on and prepare. I then said I would like to begin filming at noon. Which was in an hour.
10 minutes later she was in my office discussing with me the one thing she is in the country to do. FILM VIDEOS! So frustrating. So mother fuckingly frustrating. I could feel steam rolling out of my ears. I told my director about it, and she said, "Before we bring on anymore of her products, she needs to provide proper support to her existing products." Well said. Then I asked, "Who wants to tell that to someone up high to make it happen?" So I have no idea what she's going to do, but at least I feel supported. Which is very nice to feel supported. It's like a nice comfortable sports bra. Ahhhhh.
I was yet again, supposed to be out of the office by 4:00, but didn't get out until after 4:30. I walked into my bosses office and said I am outta here. She asked if I was coming back tomorrow. I told her I'd think about it. ;o) Unfortunately, I get to hand hold German lady in order to keep her comfortable in front of the camera. Basically, I can't trust anyone else to do it, so therefore I get to spend another week sitting in meetings and not getting anything done. Oh the joys!
My whole drive home, I blasted a variation of hard metal music to scream and yell my frustrations out. All I could do was pray that seeing my baby would put me into a better mood. Which really all pivots on if she's in a good mood or not. Luckily, she was in a great mood! So we came home and laid on my bed and giggled and drooled. OK. She drooled. I'm not really a drooler these days. I think I've got that under control.
Today is also DJ's birthday. I didn't even get to see him but this morning when I kissed him goodbye. He's not coming home tonight because he's hard at work harvesting. :o( What a crappy birthday that is for him isn't it? Don't worry though. Last night I took him to Merle Haggard. You know... Old guy... Sings country music... And I let him open his gifts last night. I think he was pretty happy last night. I hope he's not still harvesting on my birthday. Because I will lose it if I don't get to spend my actual birthday day with him.
which reminds me. Please don't email me at my office for a while. If you do, you're just going into a filtered folder for me to find some day when I get some of this shit off my plate.)
This week, I get to deal with this lady from Germany who is our CEO's current favorite pet. Nothing is organized, nothing is scheduled, and even though she says she's going to meet with you, she almost always, tries to back out. Unless you are someone she get sucker into buying into whatever new product she's developed, she doesn't want to meet with you. (Even though, it's my team that is driving sales on those products. So you'd think she'd be kicking my ass.... ) Today I got to interrupt a meeting because I was told that there was no other business to be had other than for my team to film the 16 videos we have planned.
You can probably imagine my infuriation when I walk to the boardroom to find her having a meeting. (One that I can only assume is her pushing some new product that she wants us to sell for her) After an hour passing, I complained to my boss who advised me that I interrupt and tell her we will be filming in 10 minutes. I thought that was a little harsh, so I instead interrupted and told the room full of executives that we needed to film today. To which, German lady tried to push me off until tomorrow. Which, in turn, I got to (politely as I could be) say, "I'm sorry, no. (Big fat flipping NO!) We have no time to wait until tomorrow if "you/she" wants time to know what's going on and prepare. I then said I would like to begin filming at noon. Which was in an hour.
10 minutes later she was in my office discussing with me the one thing she is in the country to do. FILM VIDEOS! So frustrating. So mother fuckingly frustrating. I could feel steam rolling out of my ears. I told my director about it, and she said, "Before we bring on anymore of her products, she needs to provide proper support to her existing products." Well said. Then I asked, "Who wants to tell that to someone up high to make it happen?" So I have no idea what she's going to do, but at least I feel supported. Which is very nice to feel supported. It's like a nice comfortable sports bra. Ahhhhh.
I was yet again, supposed to be out of the office by 4:00, but didn't get out until after 4:30. I walked into my bosses office and said I am outta here. She asked if I was coming back tomorrow. I told her I'd think about it. ;o) Unfortunately, I get to hand hold German lady in order to keep her comfortable in front of the camera. Basically, I can't trust anyone else to do it, so therefore I get to spend another week sitting in meetings and not getting anything done. Oh the joys!
My whole drive home, I blasted a variation of hard metal music to scream and yell my frustrations out. All I could do was pray that seeing my baby would put me into a better mood. Which really all pivots on if she's in a good mood or not. Luckily, she was in a great mood! So we came home and laid on my bed and giggled and drooled. OK. She drooled. I'm not really a drooler these days. I think I've got that under control.
Today is also DJ's birthday. I didn't even get to see him but this morning when I kissed him goodbye. He's not coming home tonight because he's hard at work harvesting. :o( What a crappy birthday that is for him isn't it? Don't worry though. Last night I took him to Merle Haggard. You know... Old guy... Sings country music... And I let him open his gifts last night. I think he was pretty happy last night. I hope he's not still harvesting on my birthday. Because I will lose it if I don't get to spend my actual birthday day with him.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Happy Birthday!
My friend Blac17 turns the big Three-OHHHHH! today. So I thought I'd wish her happy birthday and welcome to the club!
I know you're not supposed to tell a woman's age, but since I'm not posting any pictures of her, and because I'm already 30, I figured it didn't matter. :o)
Happy birthday girlfriend! You're my oldest friend. (Not oldest as in age, but oldest as known each other too long.)
Here's to another 20 years of friendship, and at least another great 30 years of good looks!
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
My Actual Birthday Celebrations
Well, you're all going to be disappointed. Last night was quite a bore. (I guess that's what happens when you get old.) I wound up doing my laundry, and waiting for the man to show up. DJ is working hard in the fields so he didn't leave until 6:30 or somewhere in there. He didn't get to my place until 8:00. We didn't even go out to dinner. I ordered us a pizza and we watched Nip Tuck. We didn't even do "it" because he was so tired. Poor guy. I'm not too upset about it though because the weekend was so much fun, and I know that he's really tired and stressed right now. Since it was a Tuesday, I really didn't mind doing nothing either. Snuggling with my man on a weekday felt really good. Can't wait until January when he actually lives with me! Woo hoo!
I just got back from my eye doctor. My eyes have not changed a bit! Wow! That's exciting for me because they always get worse. I started taking a supplement for them, that has Lutein, Bilberry, Zanthethin (sp) and a bunch of other crap good for your eyes. I know my left eye was getting better because things were less blurry. So I'm totally excited! My Insurance paid for my contacts in total. Unlike my crappy old job that only paid for 2/3 of them (Bastards).
I just got back from my eye doctor. My eyes have not changed a bit! Wow! That's exciting for me because they always get worse. I started taking a supplement for them, that has Lutein, Bilberry, Zanthethin (sp) and a bunch of other crap good for your eyes. I know my left eye was getting better because things were less blurry. So I'm totally excited! My Insurance paid for my contacts in total. Unlike my crappy old job that only paid for 2/3 of them (Bastards).
Monday, November 06, 2006
Saturday Part II
After I finished with DJs laundry, I decided to stop over to my Grandma’s and see what she was up to. My cousin, my aunt, and she were fixin’ to watch a movie, so I decided to stick around. I hung out with them for a couple of hours.
Hint #1 that something was going on: I call him around 3:30 to see what he’s up to, if he wants me to come out there, or what. So he tells me that he thinks he’ll quit around 5:00, and maybe we can go to dinner or something. This is weird because he NEVER quits working this early during harvest season. Especially since it was so nice out. He tells me he’ll call me when he decides to head into town. So I say, “OK” and we hang up.
Hint #2 that something was going on: He calls me at 5:01pm. He NEVER calls me exactly when he says he’s going to call. Usually he calls me 30 minutes, 40 minutes, an hour later than he tells me. So when he called. I knew for sure something was in the works.
Hint #3 that something was going on: Once he gets home, and cleaned up, he’s already ready to get out of the house and off to dinner. It was only 5:38! He doesn’t eat that early. In fact, he’s always giving me crap for being hungry around 6:00. So I just KNEW that people were waiting for us at the restaurant.
We get to the restaurant, where I am expecting to see my family sitting at a table. Instead, I see my 3 girlfriends from the Cities! I was so excited! I almost cried. I was so excited (and a little embarrassed at the same time, since the Big W is not very exciting this time of year. I wasn’t sure if they’d have any fun or not). So we ate dinner and headed out on the bustling town. Ok. (Maybe we were the only people out.)
One thing I wasn’t expecting was for DJ to organize getting my cousins and have them gather at the Legion. Usually in a small town, we all wind up drinking together anyway. So I was expecting to see some of them anyway. But turns out, he made sure to call everyone and have them come out. I had a blast. It was so much fun having Jordan, Sara, and Charlotte around again. I could post a whole separate blog on just that topic. I have a feeling my in-laws saw a whole new side to me!
Now, I KNOW for a FACT that Jordan had a good time, and I am somewhat sure Sara and Charlotte did as well. Like I said, not much to do in a small town but sit around and drink. And drink we did! Especially me. A girl who’s breaking out a new decade of life can’t turn down drink that were bought for her. Who knows when a man other than her husband will buy her a drink again? Probably never actually.
Anywho, I had a blast! It was the best birthday gift a girl could ever get from her closest friends! The gift of them! What they don’t know is how much I really loved seeing them. I can’t even try to put it into words. I’m very happy that they decided to risk their lives in someone’s silver bullet, just to come little ole Podunkville me. Thanks Sara and Charlotte for leaving your babies to come see little ole me. (ephasis on the ole now) My husband is also super fabulous, because he actually spent some time helping to coordinate this, and he's been working 18 hour days to get his crop in. I feel very blessed to have such good people to call my friends!
Oh yeah, stay tuned for photos from the evening too!
Hint #1 that something was going on: I call him around 3:30 to see what he’s up to, if he wants me to come out there, or what. So he tells me that he thinks he’ll quit around 5:00, and maybe we can go to dinner or something. This is weird because he NEVER quits working this early during harvest season. Especially since it was so nice out. He tells me he’ll call me when he decides to head into town. So I say, “OK” and we hang up.
Hint #2 that something was going on: He calls me at 5:01pm. He NEVER calls me exactly when he says he’s going to call. Usually he calls me 30 minutes, 40 minutes, an hour later than he tells me. So when he called. I knew for sure something was in the works.
Hint #3 that something was going on: Once he gets home, and cleaned up, he’s already ready to get out of the house and off to dinner. It was only 5:38! He doesn’t eat that early. In fact, he’s always giving me crap for being hungry around 6:00. So I just KNEW that people were waiting for us at the restaurant.
We get to the restaurant, where I am expecting to see my family sitting at a table. Instead, I see my 3 girlfriends from the Cities! I was so excited! I almost cried. I was so excited (and a little embarrassed at the same time, since the Big W is not very exciting this time of year. I wasn’t sure if they’d have any fun or not). So we ate dinner and headed out on the bustling town. Ok. (Maybe we were the only people out.)
One thing I wasn’t expecting was for DJ to organize getting my cousins and have them gather at the Legion. Usually in a small town, we all wind up drinking together anyway. So I was expecting to see some of them anyway. But turns out, he made sure to call everyone and have them come out. I had a blast. It was so much fun having Jordan, Sara, and Charlotte around again. I could post a whole separate blog on just that topic. I have a feeling my in-laws saw a whole new side to me!
Now, I KNOW for a FACT that Jordan had a good time, and I am somewhat sure Sara and Charlotte did as well. Like I said, not much to do in a small town but sit around and drink. And drink we did! Especially me. A girl who’s breaking out a new decade of life can’t turn down drink that were bought for her. Who knows when a man other than her husband will buy her a drink again? Probably never actually.
Anywho, I had a blast! It was the best birthday gift a girl could ever get from her closest friends! The gift of them! What they don’t know is how much I really loved seeing them. I can’t even try to put it into words. I’m very happy that they decided to risk their lives in someone’s silver bullet, just to come little ole Podunkville me. Thanks Sara and Charlotte for leaving your babies to come see little ole me. (ephasis on the ole now) My husband is also super fabulous, because he actually spent some time helping to coordinate this, and he's been working 18 hour days to get his crop in. I feel very blessed to have such good people to call my friends!
Oh yeah, stay tuned for photos from the evening too!
Saturday Part I
Saturday, 12:00pm: You’ll never guess where I am right now. It’s a place I have NEVER been before. I’m at the public laundromat. It’s so foreign to me, I didn’t even know how to spell it. Thank goodness for spell check. I thought it was laundry-mat, but apparently it’s laun-DRO-mat. What really sucks is that I have to poop really bad (and I can’t hold in my poop very well). There are bathrooms, but I don’t want to go to the bathroom because I’d have to bring my stuff in with me and that’d just be gross. I AM NOT taking my laptop into a public restroom. It hasn’t even made it into my personal one yet! I’m going to wait until it’s about to fall out, then run in there really quick. I don’t want to sit and push. That’d take WAY too long with my stuff unsupervised.
Want to know why I’m here? DJ’s washer broke down about a month or two ago, so he’s been bringing his cloths to my house to wash on weekends. Well, since he’s been farming, he has created quite the pile-o-cloths. So I decided I’d do his laundry. Luckily no one is in here to see my ignorance on this whole process. Did you know it costs $1.50 to wash your cloths these days? When I was in college it cost me $.75. And $.50 to dry. Wow. The world is ripping us off everywhere. (Ok. I really have to go, so talk to you in a minute…)
OK. I’m back. That wasn’t so bad. I inspected the BR’s and the women’s is much nicer than the men’s. If you are interested in a big dick though, call this number 320…. No, I’m not REALLY gonna give it to you. Should I write next to it, “Hey! That’s my husband’s phone number!” That’s funny to me. Tee hee.
Know what’s cool about this place? It actually has those baskets with wheels on them so you don’t have to actually carry your laundry from place to place. You can just roll it. I thought that was only in movies and TV shows like Friends. So what is the process of laundry-ing anyway? I thought when the spin cycle happened, you’re laundry was done. All 5 washers have already gone through spin, but they are still going. What up with dat? I’m so glad I don’t usually have to sit and wait for my laundry to be finished. I think I’m going to go edit some photos. Anything you want to see on my photosite? Let me know. I haven’t posted anything since October.
Stay tuned for Saturday Part II. You'll be glad you did!
Want to know why I’m here? DJ’s washer broke down about a month or two ago, so he’s been bringing his cloths to my house to wash on weekends. Well, since he’s been farming, he has created quite the pile-o-cloths. So I decided I’d do his laundry. Luckily no one is in here to see my ignorance on this whole process. Did you know it costs $1.50 to wash your cloths these days? When I was in college it cost me $.75. And $.50 to dry. Wow. The world is ripping us off everywhere. (Ok. I really have to go, so talk to you in a minute…)
OK. I’m back. That wasn’t so bad. I inspected the BR’s and the women’s is much nicer than the men’s. If you are interested in a big dick though, call this number 320…. No, I’m not REALLY gonna give it to you. Should I write next to it, “Hey! That’s my husband’s phone number!” That’s funny to me. Tee hee.
Know what’s cool about this place? It actually has those baskets with wheels on them so you don’t have to actually carry your laundry from place to place. You can just roll it. I thought that was only in movies and TV shows like Friends. So what is the process of laundry-ing anyway? I thought when the spin cycle happened, you’re laundry was done. All 5 washers have already gone through spin, but they are still going. What up with dat? I’m so glad I don’t usually have to sit and wait for my laundry to be finished. I think I’m going to go edit some photos. Anything you want to see on my photosite? Let me know. I haven’t posted anything since October.
Stay tuned for Saturday Part II. You'll be glad you did!
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Birthday Celebrations
So I've decided something really fun to do for my birthday. But it won't happen because what I want to do happens this Friday. And all my fun friends live 3 or more hours away. :o( The Thunder Down Under are appearing at the casino 1/2 way between here and the big W. They'd totally be awesome to see! They are hotter than Chipendales, and these guys have accents. Which we all know, any guy with an accent is automatically hotter than a guy without one.
It'd totally be a good time if I could get my cities friends to come down/up/over (Did I cover them all for you Jordan?) But I think the one friend who'd really appreciate this sort of thing is out of town on business this weekend (J), and the other two I think I'd have fun with (S,C) I don't really have any place to house them if they could make it. My town home would be alright, but DJ's house is closer to the casino, and his place is just embarrassing. I don't even let relatives in that place. So I guess whoa is me. Even though the casino does have hotel rooms attached to it.... Well... either way, it's a little bit short notice.
Dang! I just tried to go to their website to grab some photos and I've been "Websensed" due to sex and gambling. Dang! Websense sucks. If I remember, tonight I'll post some pics of them when I get home. I'm totally bummed because I wanted to see if there was anything going on at the casino on Saturday because that's where I think I'm going to make everyone go instead of sitting in the local bar staring at each other.
Here's one I pulled off of ticketmaster. (Enjoy if you can see it.)
It'd totally be a good time if I could get my cities friends to come down/up/over (Did I cover them all for you Jordan?) But I think the one friend who'd really appreciate this sort of thing is out of town on business this weekend (J), and the other two I think I'd have fun with (S,C) I don't really have any place to house them if they could make it. My town home would be alright, but DJ's house is closer to the casino, and his place is just embarrassing. I don't even let relatives in that place. So I guess whoa is me. Even though the casino does have hotel rooms attached to it.... Well... either way, it's a little bit short notice.
Dang! I just tried to go to their website to grab some photos and I've been "Websensed" due to sex and gambling. Dang! Websense sucks. If I remember, tonight I'll post some pics of them when I get home. I'm totally bummed because I wanted to see if there was anything going on at the casino on Saturday because that's where I think I'm going to make everyone go instead of sitting in the local bar staring at each other.
Here's one I pulled off of ticketmaster. (Enjoy if you can see it.)
Friday, October 20, 2006
All Dressed Up
And nowhere to go. I totally look cute today. I am wearing a pair of dark jeans, with my new burgundy rouched shoes, a long cream colored sweater from Target, a leather disked brown belt, a great shell necklace, and earing to match. My hair looks great. I smell great. Everything's great. I look hot. (Well, so far as fat people can look hot anyway.) I can't wait for this day to be over so I can go see my man on his birthday.
I called my man at 8:00 to wish him happy birthday, and he says he has no plans for tonight other than to work. Ummm... I told him I wanted to take him out to the Casino for some live music, dinner, and gambling. So now, we have no plans. :o( I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go. We can't do nothing for his birthday, but what can I do? It's not like I can go rip him off of his combine and force him to go out on his birthday. I'm a little sad. He told me just to go out to his parent's place and wait until he thinks he can get away. Ummmm... I HATE going out there. It's boring. I can't watch the TV I want to watch. It's too cold to ride horse, and I'm too cute to go outside and get all dirty anyway. I don't have a sewing machine, nor do I have all my scrapbooking stuff out there. So it'd basically be me talking to my in laws all night, and I don't want that either because they seem to think that they have to keep you entertained, and keep talking to you. So now I don't know when I should head down to the big W.
I called my man at 8:00 to wish him happy birthday, and he says he has no plans for tonight other than to work. Ummm... I told him I wanted to take him out to the Casino for some live music, dinner, and gambling. So now, we have no plans. :o( I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go. We can't do nothing for his birthday, but what can I do? It's not like I can go rip him off of his combine and force him to go out on his birthday. I'm a little sad. He told me just to go out to his parent's place and wait until he thinks he can get away. Ummmm... I HATE going out there. It's boring. I can't watch the TV I want to watch. It's too cold to ride horse, and I'm too cute to go outside and get all dirty anyway. I don't have a sewing machine, nor do I have all my scrapbooking stuff out there. So it'd basically be me talking to my in laws all night, and I don't want that either because they seem to think that they have to keep you entertained, and keep talking to you. So now I don't know when I should head down to the big W.
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